Our Aruba Wedding

I’m glad to say I’m still hearing about how much people loved our ceremony! In fact, last night I was hanging out with one of my guests. On his return flight he happened to sit next to a young couple that had just honeymooned in Aruba. They were staying at the Marriott Ocean club next door and lounging on the beach when our ceremony started. They were drawn by the steel pan music and wandered over to see what was going on. They ended up staying for the whole ceremony and were telling our friend how beautiful they thought it was! We had people coming up to us throughout the rest of our stay saying similar things and much of that was due to Reverend Gibson. One vacationer even told us the ceremony brought tears to her eyes.

I had exchanged several emails with Reverend Robert Gibson, contacting him after I read rave reviews on the Aruba.com forum. He saved our date for us, taking us at our word – never asking for a deposit. He said he’d be glad to personalize the ceremony as much as we would like, however we never got around to thinking much about the ceremony. Instead we trusted the forum reviews and decided to let him ‘do what he does’. 

Reverend Gibson was glad to meet with us when we arrived in Aruba to discuss ceremony details and take care of payment (cash only). For some reason we were a little ‘put off’ in that meeting even though he seemed very nice. It kind of seemed like he was more interested in telling us about how beautiful his ceremony and words are, than in getting to know us, though he did ask us if there was anything specific we wanted. We didn’t really feel a connection with him the way we did with almost everyone else we worked with. (Maybe we had just been spoiled by Chela, Edwina, Desireé, Eveline… They were all so warm, always greeting us with hugs as if we were part of their families.)

The ceremony itself was a little different than we were used to. My father walked me down the aisle and was asked to ‘present me’ to my groom (no ‘who gives this woman…’). I was ok with that. Then, immediately he invited us to share a kiss. That was unexpected and I don’t know if it was good or bad. Did it help ease the nerves or were we robbed of that ‘anticipation’?

He then spoke on his thoughts of marriage. You can tell he is well rehearsed and very comfortable in front of a crowd. Our guests were really impressed and told us what a beautiful job they thought he did. The ceremony was non-denominational and he did a great job of making everyone comfortable (neither of us is especially religious but I have Christian family members and his are Hindu). We exchanged traditional vows and then he asked us to share some ‘vows’ of our own. He had warned us the day before that he would ask us to say a few words. He insisted that we should not give it any thought or preparation – that we should relax and say what comes from the heart in that moment. He said he’s ‘never seen it go wrong – something beautiful always comes out’. We trusted him and went with it.

Unfortunately I hate to say I may be the exception where ’something beautiful’ didn’t come out. Not that anything bad did, but I remember feeling really uncomfortable and kind of floundered for words and ended up embarrassed. My husband always likes to lighten the mood and say things that are fun and likes to think of us as ’sugar and spice’ (I’m white, he’s Indian). I’m afraid to watch the video because I have a feeling he actually said that in the ceremony! (It was all a blur so I can’t remember for sure…)

He then shared his ‘Aruba Blessing,’ pronounced us husband and wife, and invited us to move to the table for the signing of the certificate and Sand Ceremony. This ‘blending of sands’ is kind of Aruba’s version of a unity candle. You take sands from separate containers and pour them into one which you can then keep as a keepsake. He invited my husbands children to also join in that ceremony and they also signed the certificate. (Its not a real marriage certificate since no legal weddings can be done on the beach in Aruba – the certificate is just a keepsake and the signing is for show.)

We were disappointed that Reverend Gibson never mentioned we would need to provide a vase for the ceremony, as well as colored sands if we wanted sand other than plain beach sand. Maybe this should have been obvious, but we had no idea. So, 24 hours before the wedding our wedding planner went looking for this vase and happened to have some colored sands available. The vase she found was very nice, however it was $150 AWG (nearly $85 USD). We could have found something comparable in the states for probably $25 and brought it with us. Of course this is a downfall of working with a vendor directly. Often you would arrange the services of the Reverend through the wedding planner who would know about the vase that would be needed. However we had selected Reverend Gibson well before we met with any wedding planners.

At the end of the ceremony, he invited our guests to come up and congratulate us. We had 43 guests so this took some time. While I loved receiving the hugs and wishes I felt bad for the guests waiting in line to congratulate us as it was 90º+ and almost no wind. We were also eager to get on with our photos and keep the rest of the evening’s activities on schedule. I can’t say we had time to visit with every person at the reception though, so maybe this was best. 

So what would we have done differently? I will tell you that we did hear some grumbling from some of our local contacts that would have preferred we choose a different minister. I heard stories of him scheduling weddings too close together and arriving late or rushing off too quick. He assured us he had blocked 4:00-6:00pm for us so the timing would not be an issue. (At one time I wondered if we might move the ceremony from 4:30 to 5:00 and had asked him if it would be a problem if that decision was made last minute – he said it wouldn’t be a problem.) Also, more than one person warned us they feel like his ego is getting a little too big and we admit we did feel a little put off. That said, he is popular for a reason. He did a beautiful job and like in the other reviews, the guests absolutely loved him. And really, this is more a show for the guests, isn’t it? The ‘free form vows’ I would have either prepared or left that out and I would have brought the vase for the sand ceremony from home. While we didn’t have a videographer for the ceremony, we may have a couple of guests that took some home video I might be willing to share.

We had our ceremony on the beach at the Aruba Marriott. Sunset was at 6:14 that night so we chose to have our ceremony start at 4:30. We did not want a ’sunset ceremony’. Our idea was we would have the ceremony, then guests would move on to the cocktail hour to enjoy steel pan music and the sunset while we were taking photos. Also, the photographers told us the best light is the hour just before sunset, so we wanted most of our photos taken between 5:00-6:00. (Believe it or not, we don’t care about ’sunset photos’. Instead of capturing sunset photos, a little after 6:00 we were on our way inside to enjoy an orange mojito in the lobby bar before going upstairs to change clothes.)

The day of the ceremony, guests were asked to gather in the lobby around 4:15pm. Desireé, the Marriott’s wedding planner, would be walking the guests in groups to the ceremony location, when she confirmed everything was on schedule. She didn’t want our guests to spend more time than necessary waiting in the heat if we were for some reason delayed. Good thing too, because it was HOT! And Aruba’s characteristic ‘wind’ seemed to have left us that afternoon, so the ceremony was probably 90º with very little breeze! (Desireé had recommended we instead had the ceremony start at 5:00 because of the heat, but we stuck with 4:30 since we didn’t want to miss out on the hour of primo light.)

My groom joined his two groomsmen up at the arch while the guests were being seated. (We did not have the groomsmen ‘walk the aisle’ with the bridesmaid and maid of honor.) His eldest son seated both of our mothers and then it was time to begin!

Steel pan music played as my bridesmaid and maid of honor walked down the aisle up to the bamboo and white fabric arch. Our flower girl (daughter of the maid of honor) started off great, but then decided to walk off and do her own thing which was fine. For us it was something to laugh about – after all, she had just turned 3 so we knew something like that might happen. Then my dad walked me down the aisle to the steel pan ‘here comes the bride’. Somehow I thought it would be cheesy to have that song played by the steel drum, but it was actually quite nice. That tune tugs at the emotion but the steel pan playing it made it seem so cheerful and fun – perfect for the beach!

I wore a gorgeous Romona Keveza Collection silk gown, Nadri chandelier earrings and bangles, and high heeled wedge flip flops. Luckily Romona’s dresses have the most amazing construction so I didn’t need any ’support undergarments’. A simple pair of lace undies is all was needed under that dress! And I heeded the advice from bridal consultants that said limit the veil to simple single tier of fingertip length, though I also brought a cathedral length veil which I used for other photos. (I purchased both veils on eBay for only $20 each!) Had there been a lot of wind, I would have just tucked a little bit of the veil in the back of the dress to hold it in place. (My ‘reception’ dress which I’ll show in the reception review was a gorgeous Nicole Miller gown purchased on RueLaLa.com. RueLaLa has short ‘private sales’ of designer clothes and accessories, during one of which I purchased the $2600 gown for only $650! They emailed me a teaser two days before and I was lucky enough to snag that dress before it sold out.) My bouquet was white cymbidium orchids and white freesia and the bridesmaids carried orange calla lilies. (I loved my bouquet even though it was really expensive but wasn’t impressed with the bridesmaid bouquets. I’ll elaborate more on flowers in another post.)

The Ceremony:

For the ceremony, we chose Reverend Gibson, whom I had communicated via email for a few months and we met in person the day before. He’s definitely a pro and very comfortable in front of the group. There was something that put me off a little bit, but I can’t put my finger on what is was (maybe I’ll figure it out by the time I write a more detailed review for him).

We exchange traditional vows and were then asked to say some words of our own. He had warned us the day before that he would ask us to do this. He insisted ‘Don’t worry about it – don’t even give it a thought’. He said he had never seen it go wrong. He said relax and something beautiful will come out, ‘it always does’. We decided to go ahead and leave that part in and trust him. When the time came though, I hate to say that I felt a little lost (luckily the groom had to go first!). Did some beautiful words come to me when it was my turn? I’m afraid not. I thought it was really awkward and I remember feeling embarrassed. I haven’t seen the video yet – when I do maybe I’ll decide he was right. My hunch though? Probably not.

After we are pronounced husband and wife we were invited to participate in the ‘sand ceremony‘, kind of Aruba’s version of a unity candle. We invited my husbands children to participate with us and filled the sand vase as a family. (By the way, we hired Rev. Gibson directly and in our email communications he never mentioned we’d need to provide the vase for the ceremony. We found out about that the day before. Luckily, Edwina came to the rescue and found us a beautiful vase and some colored sands.) The vase gets filled, the ‘keepsake certificate’ signed and then he invites guests to come up and congratulate us. It was nice to get that hug from each person right after the ceremony, however it took a while and I kind of feel like our guests were wanting some shade and a drink and not so excited about waiting in line to say their congratulations at that moment. (And we wanted to move on to our photos so we could stay on schedule.)

Decorating:

We chose to simply line the aisle with palm leaves. (The pink / orange ombre rose petal pattern I had in mind would have likely been disrupted by the wind and sand. I had instead chosen a white carpet runner which I decided against at the last minute. I had been considering the runner so that it would be easier for me to walk in my high heeled wedge flip, but then a carpet on the sand just didn’t seem right.)

We chose to do almost no decorating of the ceremony – no flowers at all and no sashes. We rented the folding chairs (which I think are more sophisticated than the plastic slip covered / sashed chairs) and bamboo and fabric arch from Edwina / E2. I had briefly wondered if I should have at least decorated the chairs at the ends by the aisle, but was glad we chose to leave them plain. We just didn’t want to spend more money than necessary on the ceremony – we wanted to save our budget for the party! I never felt like anything was missing.

The Beach:

If you’re planning an Aruba wedding you probably already know that there are no private beaches in Aruba! Many couples are bothered by this and its probably one of the biggest reasons some choose Renaissance Island, where you get to rent out the whole Island and you have ultimate privacy. Edwina warned us that Palm Beach is much busier than Eagle Beach which is why she prefers Eagle Beach for weddings. We had read posts from couples that were concerned about having tourists and water sports activities in their photos. The fact that Marriott is the Palm Beach hotel furthest to the north, we hoped these things would be less of a problem.

So, were there sunbathers laying around watching the wedding? Was there water sports activity going on in the background? Was there anyone in a speedo walking the beach? Yes, Yes and Yes! Were we bothered by these things, like the fact that some of our ceremony photos show a person in the water in the middle of the arch (shown here)? Surprisingly, no! Aside from one group of skimpily clad people that we politely asked to move during family photos after the wedding, we weren’t bothered. We really didn’t even notice the extra audience to the sides and were able to laugh off the occasional person strolling the beach. You may notice two of the photos in this post are almost identical with the exception that in one the swimmer is easily Photoshop-ed out of the arch. With as much as I get hung up on so many other things, I’m surprised that this didn’t bother me. I will try to post more photos later and let you judge for yourself how big of a deal it is. If you do want to be assured more privacy though, I’d consider Ren Island or Eagle Beach.

Things I am glad we did:

• Kept the ceremony decoration simple! I did not want to spend a lot of money decorating a short ceremony and wondered if I would regret that later. In the end, that simplicity was something I loved.
• Steel pan player: I believe Tico was the steel pan player and he did a fantastic job. Marriott positioned him perfectly between the cocktails and ceremony and the volume was perfect. I had wondered if a single steep pan would be enough and I totally think it was. (Other options were a steel pan trio or a steel pan and guitar duo.)
• Timing: I’m glad we kept the 4:30 timing (vs. moving back to 5:00), even though it was hot.
• Cocktail hour: Arranged for a cocktail hour to follow. (We limited it to 2 signature cocktails, beer and wine and fruit and cheese displays to help keep the cost down.)

Things I might have done differently:

• Sand Ceremony: I would have brought a vase from home for the sand ceremony. I think we paid $80 for a simple glass vase that I could have purchase for a fraction of that here at home. I also might have liked to pick out this keepsake myself. For the sand, you can keep it as simple as using some beach sand, or you can use some colored sands. Luckily we loved the combination of natural sand and earthy colored sands Edwina found for us.
• Vows: Put some thought into the words Reverend Gibson would ask us to exchange

So, the final verdict – should we have done our ceremony elsewhere? No way! We found the Marriott’s beach to be much less crowded than other hotels on Palm Beach and really wanted the convenience of having everything in one place. We didn’t have to worry about transporting guests between the ceremony and reception site. We wanted everything to be as easy as possible for our guests who had come so far. Also, some guests like being able to sneak up to their room to change into something more comfortable for the reception. Having spotless facilities nearby (bar and restrooms) was a plus as well. And we actually enjoyed having total strangers come up to us the rest of the weekend telling us they had watched our ceremony on the beach. Some said that it was the most beautiful ceremony they had ever seen. Every “Congratulations” was well received and we even had one lady say our ceremony brought tears to her eyes. Awww…. !

There were some things I liked about the Mandara Spa at the Marriott’s Ocean Club property next door to the resort. They have Phyto products which are awesome (in particular their volumizing spray). They use Bare Escentuals mineral make-up which is what I use at home! They gave me ice water with lemon which was refreshing and played nice calming music. Also, one of my bridesmaids had her hair done at the Mandara Spa. She was really happy with the bun, but when she asked them to ‘flat-iron / straighten’ her bangs, they didn’t seem to know what she was asking for. She went back to the room and did her bangs herself.

For me though, the ‘zen’ ended there. The people were very nice but it just wasn’t the experience I was hoping for. I was taken to the room where hair and make-up would be done and wasn’t impressed. It was small – maybe 7′ x 9′? The cabinets were dark and looked dated as did the plain porcelain tiled floor. (When I visited the Westin’s Intermezzo Spa, I remember their hair / make-up room being modern, bright and immaculate.) The Mandara room was crowded and there was a layer of dust on the cabinet in my line of vision. (All I really had to look at was a mirror inches in front of me and part of that dusty cabinet.) The room felt worn and tired. The lighting was also terrible – I remember big bright light directly overhead – there are no windows for any natural light and I don’t remember additional light sources. If I looked forward at my face, my eyes were just black shadows, so to see my eye make-up I had to either tip my head way back and hold a mirror hand-held mirror or go outside. You also hear the conversations going on at the front desk which are a little distracting.

Hair Trial: Thursday was my hair trial with Carmen. She seemed very nice but didn’t speak english so the manager, Cheryl would ask what I wanted and try to translate. I wasn’t bothered at first because I had brought photos. One of my inspiration photos is the image, left. I liked that it looked organic and beachy. Unfortunately, the first hair attempt was totally wrong. I wanted an updo with some volume that still looked natural, which I know is a challenge with my fine hair. She started with the curling, and then did some teasing. Then she took small sections of the front and twisted and pinned them back. It totally reminded me of a high school ‘prom’ hairstyle. Taking a closer look at the picture here, I can ‘kind of’ see how she got that style from one of the pictures, though there was some volume only on top and the sides were stuck to my head. In the back she tried to do a fancy bun which just doesn’t work with my baby fine hair and wasn’t in any of the photos I had showed her.

Cheryl came in to check and when I was really unhappy Cheryl explained some more to Carmen and Carmen started over. We then moved on to my alternate inspiration photo, shown here. Neither of the ladies seemed to get upset with having to start over. They seemed to be very patient which I really appreciated, so I was not yet concerned. This time she did some teasing giving me some volume on top, and tried another sort of fancy bun with three distinct sections which again didn’t work with my fine hair. (Maybe this is the trend of the day that brides ask for that has somehow missed me.) The volume on top only gave my head a triangular shape and made my forehead look huge. I didn’t get anything close to the sideswept front you see here.

By now its been 2 hours. I’m just about ready to cry, especially as I’m thinking of all the other things I’m supposed to be working on (putting together bags for the welcome party) and we haven’t done any make-up yet. I point again to my photo and ask if there is any way we can do something more like that. She takes my hair down and it does in fact have some volume in it. That’s when I ask, can’t we just kind of gather this to the side and put it in a more natural bun (like the photo!!!)? As if I had just grabbed it and tied it up. Finally, everyone agreed yes, they could do that. They would blow it dry and put it in rollers for a while to get the volume, then tease and tie it up. We didn’t have time to try it but I finally felt like they understood what I wanted, and we at least had a plan for the wedding day. I made another appointment for the make-up trial for the next day and scramble out of there to run upstairs and start assembling welcome bags (which would take 3 hours)!

Friday’s make-up trial went worse than hair. Keep in mind time is really tight and this is an appointment I wasn’t expecting to need. I presented one photo, shown left. VERY soft natural make-up except for some drama in the eyes. The eyes feature sandy and bronze colors, darker at the outside and shimmery on the lid. Somehow I ended up with really heavy purplish-grey eye shadow all around. I was stunned to be presented with something that was nothing like my photo. Cheryl came in again and again took Carmen to look at the color photo on the computer (our printout was black and white, though I had a color image on my iPhone). She did it again with natural colors, but pretty light – no drama. I was feeling defeated and running late for a meeting so I called it ‘good enough’. One note – as I was leaving I noticed lipstick she used was crumbling and peeling off (don’t know what kind it was but it was very strange). I walked back into the salon to point this out and she said she’d us a different kind the next day. I ran upstairs, wiped off as much of the make-up as I could and then rushed to my meeting.

Wedding Day! Luckily we were finally all on the same page with the hair. Carmen did a beautiful job! Great hair, first try! Very natural (I think) and looked much more like ‘me’. I was asked to arrive with it damp so she could blow it out and put in the velcro rollers. After that she teased quite a bit and then parted to the side and pulled it back into a simple neat bun that didn’t look ‘over-done’. Then she brought out the super-hold hairspray and oh my god — the hair did not move all night!

Make-up wasn’t so easy. I asked, could she do the eye a little more like my photo and am told yes. What I ended up with was the really light eye. I asked again, can it be a little more like my photo — a little drama at the outside of the eye? Another lady took over and added way too much, some of which had fallen under the eye leaving me with what looked like dark shadows (they said they would put a tissue underneath to catch falling shadow but didn’t). They had also put on way too much blush which looked like a poor attempt at ‘contouring’ my chubby cheeks. I didn’t dare to let them work with it more and left.

I left the Mandara and stopped to where Edwina’s (our independent wedding planner’s) make-up artist was working on the moms. In a few minutes she expertly helped me with the false eyelashes the Mandara could not help with. I really liked her and wished she had been the one to help me with my own hair and make-up which she would have done for a lot less money.

I got back to the room feeling like I am wearing a pound of make-up. Luckily my photographers are also friends and weren’t shy about telling me I could lose most of the make-up! (Initially I had given the make-up artist the benefit of the doubt thinking maybe I really need that much make-up for photos.) I started by using a dry wash cloth to rub off a lot of the blush and breathed a big sigh of relief. Then I wiped away a lot of the eye make-up and tried to soften it by putting some highlighter on top of the dark that wouldn’t lighten up. I also rubbed under the eyes and finally ended up with something that looked more like my photo and had a little drama.

So, in all, I have to say that the Mandara Spa might not be the beautiful ’spa experience’ you are looking for. I wouldn’t say not to use them but definitely do a trial and have photos that show exactly what you want, hopefully front and back. I’m sorry I don’t have pictures of the trials that ‘went so wrong’ but I was just too embarrassed by how bad they looked. I’ve also read online reviews that say their manicures and pedicures are pretty bad. On TripAdvisor is a review from a bride who loved her Marriott wedding but said she went back to the room and redid her Mandara manicure and pedicure herself the day of the wedding.  I guess I should have done like her and asked for at least part of my money back but I just needed to move on.

I do feel that hair and make-up might have gone better if there wasn’t a language barrier. I think not being able to communicate ‘as we go’ caused problems and I hated having to call the manager in. She comes in the room expecting me to be happy and I’m nearly in tears. It was really awkward and I think led to me giving up quicker than I otherwise might.

Cost: I believe I paid around $100 for the hair trial, around $75 for the make-up trial, $170 for my hair and make-up on the wedding day and only $50 for the bridesmaid updo. (The bridesmaid asked for a simple french twist but instead got a bun – luckily she liked the bun better than the twist she had in mind.) Total cost, around $400 for 4 services, only one of which we were totally happy with (the bridal updo on the wedding day).

If I were to do it again, I would probably have worked with Edwina’s lady who seemed really sweet and came to the hotel. (By the way — the Marriott let us use an open ‘meeting room’ for the hair and make-up for the moms and maid of honor which worked out perfectly!) Sorry – if you want to book her, you’ll have to make that booking through Edwina. I do not have the stylists information to share – her services were part of the billing from Edwina.

Well I think this is the week things are really going to start coming together. As expected, I am now getting LOTS of emails from our independent wedding planner — she rocks! One thing she has is a stylist who will come to your room and do your hair and make-up. Her up-dos cost much less than the Mandara Spa. Still – I wanted to see photos which I have just received and have to say the work is very nice. Looks like she can probably do as elaborate of a style as you want. Also — one thing I really appreciated – she shared a couple of photos and wanted me to assure her I would not share them with anyone else. I promised her I would keep them to myself and really like the fact that she protects the privacy of her brides. She is a lady of integrity. We had a good feeling from the moment we met her and have not had a single second thought since making the decision to hire her. Also, this is a good example of how an independent planner can save you money.

After several emails with the manager of the Mandara Spa, I now have ‘tentative’ appointments for Saturday for me, my girls (bridesmaids) and my mom. I had to secure the appointment with my credit card but am told it will not be charged until the appointment. (You can cancel up to 24 hours before the appointment. If you cancel less than 24 hours before you will be charged for the appointment.) The only frustrating thing is I don’t have pricing. She says they don’t really know until your ‘consultation’ and the actual appointment. They need to see the hairstyle desired and see the hair type of the person. I pushed for a ‘price range’ (an average), because I’ll be having my hair done no matter what, but for my bridesmaids and mother the price could definitely make a difference.

On one hand, the Marriott’s wedding package pricing tells you $150 for a bridal updo. I’m wondering is a bridesmaid updo the same? Even if its a simple french twist or bun? Finally I’m told that any updo ’starts at $75′. That’s definitely better than a guaranteed $150, so I’m expecting it to fall somewhere in the middle. She says you can help control your cost by showing up with your hair freshly washed and blow dried.

Make-up starts at $85, whether you are a bride or member of the wedding party.

So, I was thinking maybe the salon visit would be something I will treat my bridesmaids to (I only have two) and treat my mother to hair and makeup. But that would really add up. I would expect those three hairstyles and makeup could easily reach $400 by the time service fees are added in. (You still have a service fee with the spa, but by booking your appointment directly, don’t also have a service fee from Marriott.) And of course I’m counting on my hair and make-up running about $250. So now, what to do? If I’m going to spend $100 on each of the girls, I have to wonder if there is something they’d like more than a hairdo. Like a J Crew gift certificate or spa treatment?

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Well I haven’t given much thought to “Something Borrowed, Something Blue” yet, but I have finally started looking for my bridal jewelry. Aside from my engagement ring I don’t have anything glam. I’ve been looking for some really nice CZ pieces but am shocked at how expensive they are. Then I stumbled across a site that will rent diamond jewelry. Kind of seemed like a weird idea at first but then I started looking around. There is a gorgeous $9800 necklace on there that can be rented for $290 (the beautiful ‘lace’ pattern can’t really be seen in the photo, left.) I’m also in love with some beautiful diamond drop earrings for just over $100, close to the price I was going to pay for CZ. (Though don’t get me started on the $21,000 bracelet – out of my league but wow). Of course the nice thing about CZ is that I’ll have it forever. The question is, will I wear it again? Do I want it as a keepsake? Or could these glamorous diamonds be my ’something borrowed’? Just check out all of the bridal magazines and shows where they’ve been featured…

Something Borrowed and Something New - Diamond Jewelry Rental

I’m sure I’m not the only bride that suffers from moments of irrational sensitivity, but boy do I feel bad when it happens. One thing I want to get crossed off my list is my appointments for my bridal hair and makeup and trial run. I emailed our hotel wedding planner asking if she can make the appointment and she tells me that she could make the appointment for me and charge it to the master account along with other wedding expenses. However if she does that I would have to pay the additional 22% (service fees and taxes) that they add to everything. She said instead, I would be better off to call them directly to make the appointment secured with my credit card. (She couldn’t take my credit card and make that appointment for me.)

Well that managed to set me off in a bit of a tizzy. I thought it should be an easy thing for her to make a call and secure the appointment and then let me pay the spa directly when I get there. The prospect of having to to call them frustrated me because I can’t make an international calls through my cell phone or through work. (Would you believe I am 11 weeks away from the wedding have have not yet made a single phone call to Aruba? They’ve called me but I haven’t called down there yet.) So I get online to purchase a phone card and find myself waiting for them to ‘verify’ the account before I can use it.

So here I am steaming and totally lose sight of what should have been obvious. The wedding planner was actually doing me a great service by making a suggestion that could save us money! And the simple solution was to ask her to pass my email address and phone number to the person that would make the appointment. Early yesterday morning the salon manager had already called (a call I missed), and today I receive a very kind email follow up from her! It turns out this is not as simple as ‘making an appointment’. She actually wants to get an idea of what I want – already wants to see photos, and wants to make sure we can find time for me to make it into the salon for a ‘free consultation‘ a day or two before the wedding. (I’m sure there will be costs involved with a full trial but at least they want to make time to meet with me before the wedding day.)

Anyway – I totally feel like an idiot and am now really looking forward to working with the salon. I don’t have the appointment or costs yet, but definitely have a much better attitude. I haven’t even thought much about what I want to do with my hair (though it will be easier to pick a style knowing it needs to be up). I hadn’t given it much thought because I don’t have a veil yet. But now I’m thinking maybe it makes sense to pick the hair before the veil? So far I like the picture I included in this post. It’s from the Knot. And I’m also wondering if I should do a hair test run at home with my stylist who knows my hair and bring those photos with me.

I just stumbled across a tip from a make-up artist about getting married in hot climates – consider an IcyBag! I’m afraid these aren’t glamorous or sexy but am glad I found out about this sooner rather than later! Imagine a 90º wedding ceremony – you’re ok because of the Aruban wind – but you go to re-apply your lipstick only to find that its melted! I’ve actually had this happen before and don’t know why I didn’t think of it til today. An IcyBag is an insulated cosmetic pouch that has freezer pack inserts that will keep your cosmetics cool. I’m so glad I didn’t purchase my wedding purse yet because now I’ll be sure to find one that’s just bigger than my IcyBag. Here is a write-up that was in USA Today, July 23, 2007:

Cool makeup for a hot day. Sweltering temps melting your makeup and firing you up? Chill your temper and your products with an IcyBag, a fully insulated makeup bag with a compartment for two freezable gel packs that last up to four hours. The $14.99 bag sells online at IcyBag.com.

Creator Kathy Cohen came up with the idea five years ago after a makeup meltdown during her outdoor wedding. “I went to reapply my makeup and everything had melted,” she says. ‘” said ‘I can’t be the only one who has gone through this”.

And for those who need more than fresh makeup to perk themselves up at a long outdoor wedding, the bags can also keep mini-liquor bottles refreshingly cool.

Here are a few of my wedding photography tips that I’ve collected from various places…

• Have your make-up professionally done! Make-up that is going to look great in photos is tough to do. I has to be heavier to stay on all day. So many brides have make-up that’s washed out or try to put heavier make-up on by themselves and end up looking clownish.
• CLEAN YOUR ROOM! I’ve read that it drives photographers crazy when they come to take you’re getting ready photos and you have junk splayed from one end of the room to the other. As expected, brides are often in a frenzy trying to get everything done and can easily overlook what a mess the room is. Of course they realize this later when they get the photos back. So, have house-keeping come and make the bed and if necessary just hove the extra stuff in drawers or the closet so its out of your photos. Before reading this tip, I could have been the girl getting ready with diet coke cans (my signature!) and my pajamas in the background!
• Bring a nice hanger - we’ve all seen beautiful pictures of the dress hanging up before its put on, however who wants to see a wire dry cleaning hanger? Take a moment and put the dress on a nice hanger before leaving home. Hopefully the hotel will have a nice one, however some hotels have those hangers you can’t remove from the rod.

I think we have a wedding day itinerary! I’m not one that sees myself getting married ‘at sunset’, but the sunset will definitely play a part. So before we could even start putting a schedule together we had to find out when sunset is. Here’s a great website that will tell you the sunset time of any day: www.timeanddate.com. We will have sunset at around 6:15, so now we start working backwards.

I would like for my guests to be able to enjoy the sunset during the cocktail hour while we get our private sunset photos. So, that puts cocktail hour at 5:30-6:30. The ceremony is expected to be about 20 minutes so I was thinking wedding at 5:00, but the hotel wedding planner insists that no one will be at the cocktail hour that quickly. (People want to say their congratulations, get some photos, etc.) Also, the photographers would prefer the ceremony be a little earlier so the sun is a little higher as they take ceremony photos. Makes sense to not have the sun right in their eyes and back-lighting us. So, that brings us to a 4:30 ceremony. Only downside is that its really hot at that time but we’re keeping things casual (no suits and ties!) and will have guests met with ice cold coconuts upon the finish of the ceremony. Another bride said they actually cut the cake their on the beach after the ceremony and we kind of like that idea.

So here is the day:

• 11:00am: Hair and make-up
• 2:00: “Getting Ready” (dressed) photos
• 2:30: Photos of my fiance and I alone
• 3:30: Photos of us with wedding party
• 4:30: Ceremony on beach (steel drum music)
  
• 5:00: Cake Cutting, Congratulations and photos with guests
• 5:30: Family photos
• 5:30: Guests move on to cocktail hour also on beach (steel drum music continues)
• 6:00: We sneak away for our sunset photos
• 6:30: Dinner
• 7:30: PARTY! (DJ for dinner and dancing)

While there is part of me that doesn’t want him to see me til I walk down the aisle, after talking to the photographer I think its a good idea to get the bulk of our photos together done before the ceremony. She says we will still plan out that ‘first sight’ and she will capture that moment we see each other for the first time. She also says having those photos out of the way helps us to relax and have fun and takes off some of the pressure walking down the aisle. And best of all we’re ready to party earlier!