Our Aruba Wedding

Edwina Werleman is the owner of E2 Events and Celebrations where she not only offers planning services but also owns wedding and party rentals. We adored Edwina from the moment we met Edwina during our site visit in May. She helped us explore our options, in particular, high-rise vs low-rise – Palm Beach vs Eagle Beach. (Eagle Beach weddings are a specialty of hers.) Even though we ended up choosing to keep things simple with a high-rise / Palm Beach venue with the Aruba Marriott, Edwina was a huge resource to us! She’ll be kind of like your ‘Aruban mom’, taking you under her wing and looking out for you.

We were really happy with the Marriott but were glad Edwina was there to help us where the Marriott left off. Most importantly, there was a look and feel that we wanted for our event that we were finding very difficult to find. The setting is gorgeous and will be more than enough for many people, but we wanted a little bit of what I think of as a ‘Miami Beach’ vibe.

First, I have a real aversion to the plastic slip-covered, sashed chairs I’ve seen in most set-ups at most hotels (from Eagle Beach set-ups to the Hyatt, you see this everywhere – maybe you’re lucky enough to find it charming). Luckily for us though, Edwina has recently invested in some simple clean white folding chairs that worked out perfectly! (We used them for the ceremony and then they were moved to the dinner.) We received so many of compliments on the bamboo and fabric arch we rented from her – it was just perfect and she can drape it however you would like, even with colors. So, if you have something you’d like to see, send her the photo – she can probably do it.

We also wanted the dinner space on the lawn to be more intimate and fell in love with the idea of a fabric canopy that would mimic our arch. We didn’t want to feel like we were having an ‘expensive picnic’. We wanted to create a little drama with one or two long tables and the lawn was a great space for it, however I didn’t want to feel ’so exposed’. (We knew we wanted dancing poolside.) When we had just about given up on the idea of a canopy, Edwina decided she could invest in this for us. We are so glad she did. It turned out beautiful! It made the space so much more special and I loved the softly flowing sheer drapes. She had crew there the night before waiting for its delivery and had set-up ready to begin at 5am on the wedding day! It was decorated with hanging silk organza lanterns suspended by ropes of crystals (hopefully I’ll get a better picture soon).

Next, I wanted candelight but was not liking the ‘rustic’ lanterns that were available. I fell in love with some contemporary nickel lanterns I had seen at Restoration Hardware. After careful consideration, she decided she could invest in those for us as well – from 7″ tall to 24″ there must be at least 40 of them. In addition to using some of these lanterns on the tables, we used them throughout the ‘lounge’. Desiree and Edwina worked together to create a really chic lounge space for us that was perfect! Our guests loved having a comfortable place to sit, where they could watch the activity on the dance floor and still feel like part of the activity. The folding chairs are great, but toward the end of the night they so appreciated the Marriott’s comfy seating and the lanterns helped give the space some of that ‘Miami Beach’ feel.

Edwina worked with the florist as well. We were really frustrated by the 19% ’service fee’ Marriott adds to everything, however they were cool with letting us hire these services through Edwina. (The service fee is a corporate policy they can’t do anything about, however it was a big point of contention for us since Westin and Hyatt add the service fee to food and beverage only. Hopefully that policy will change someday.) Flowers ended up being a struggle for us, as you may have read, but much of the blame falls on me for waiting til the end to figure out what I wanted. And of course I wanted something they don’t have! Everyone worked really hard and we did get some beautiful flowers. (And by the way — the ’sprayed mums’ I was so opposed to turned out beautiful!)

Edwina also helped us with other things like having these yummy dutch butter cookies made fresh for our welcome bags and arranged to have hair and make-up done at the hotel for our mothers and maid of honor. (Marriott graciously let us use an available meeting room that worked out perfectly!) We also hired our videographer through Edwina and are looking forward to seeing the video!

It was nice to work with someone that had the flexibility to do things Marriott could not. Everyone seemed to work together so well and we were grateful that the Marriott did not give us a hard time about using some of our own vendors (some of the other hotels aren’t as accommodating). Marriott knows what they do well, and are good sports about letting you bring in what they cannot give you.

Edwina is wonderfully receptive to new ideas. If you can give her a picture, she can probably figure out how to make it happen! (Though keep in mind importing anything to Aruba is very expensive – duty and shipping on our lanterns cost as much as the lanterns themselves!) Edwina is very honest and will tell you what things she can and cannot do well. And she usually replies to emails surprisingly quick! She’s a little crazy though, often replying at 1-2am – we don’t know how she does that and then get up in the wee hours to supervise her crew.

Not only would work with Edwina if we could do it all again, but I now also consider her a friend!

If you’ve been following this blog at all, you know my aversion to floodlights! By default, Marriott will give you some spotlights to light your functions. (The good side of this is I don’t remember any ‘lighting’ fees – I think that lighting of the space is included in any other set-up fees you might be paying. Please correct me if I’m wrong.)

Our goal was to create a mood with lighting. We were off to a good start with the tiki torches the Marriott provided us. They helped delineate the space and carry through that ‘island vibe’. Then Edwina had invested in some contemporary lanterns we loved that would bring candle light to the lounge and dinner table. Now we needed to finish of the dinner and dancing spaces. Most important to us was nicely lighting the dinner canopy which was a large expense for us. We wanted to see some classy ‘up-lighting’. My husband also loved the idea of putting lighting under the buffet tables. To be honest, I didn’t really care about lighting the dance area much, but now can’t imagine the area without it. Nice lighting is just one of those things that take an even up a notch.

Anyway – the week before we started to get really anxious because lighting wasn’t sorted out. Desireé ended up putting us in touch with Mark Benson who was already going to be managing the reception entertainment. Mark also owns Elite Productions. The night we got there we met with Mark and DJ Randolph about the entertainment, and then walked the space with Mark to talk about lighting. His first quote (our ‘wish list’) was out of our reach, but we came to a really nice compromise that was in our budget.

Below you see the lighting under the buffet tables creating a little drama. (Keep in mind it will be dark by the time dinner is served.) You also see our first dance – I know I talk a lot about ‘drama‘ — I’ve never been looking for a lot of drama, but just a touch like you see in the first dance photo. And finally our dinner canopy – when it got a little darker the canopy was beautifully lit with a combination of candlelight and accent lighting.

Thank you so much to Mark Benson for helping us to create the ambiance we were looking for!

Somehow I managed to get myself all worked up again yesterday. There is now pressure to make final decisions yet I don’t feel like I have all the information I need to make them so I start to panic. Luckily this is where my groom and I work well together. As I become this crumpled pile of tears, he grabs the reigns for a while and now I think we are back on track. We had a conference call a couple of hours ago and I’m feeling a lot better. I also had a 4+ hour drive back to Michigan which I used to try to put things back into perspective.

Lighting: Somehow I was expecting that now that deadlines imminent, we would be getting responses and answers much quicker. We had the lighting conference call last Wednesday and it was Monday before I finally sent another email since there had been no follow through that I was aware of. Something interesting did come out of it though. We didn’t get a meeting with the company Marriott was initially going to refer us to, but were finally referred to the DJ. I found this referral a bit strange – why would the Marriott not have referred us to this DJ that was already working for us – the one they wanted us to hire? While I am still unclear on that, it turns out that the entertainment company that will provide the DJ also does in fact do lighting.

I had thought the entertainment company’s lighting was limited to disco / dance floor type lighting but there may be more that they do. And it looks like this may be the better way to go anyway. Are we disappointed to not be working with the company we did not get the meeting with? No. The Marriott had already warned us that they would be really expensive. Also, our independent planner has warned us against using that company at all.  Finally it turns out they are really just ‘event planners’. The event planner would then just turn around and hire someone like the entertainment company to actually do the lighting. So, we may be in good hands working with the entertainment company directly. And really, are lighting needs aren’t that significant – we just want some indirect lighting instead of floodlights.

Flowers: last night I really felt lost. We finally fall asleep for a while but then both woke up around 2:00am when my groom decides to send another email to the wedding planner. Somehow he often seems to have better luck. You want to know the crazy thing? He says she actually replied after that, after 2:00am! Reinforces what I already knew — that she works SO HARD. I don’t know the contents of the email, but believe that by the end of the day we’ll have some more guidance. Today they are supposed to set up the tables to get an idea of how many arrangement she thinks may be necessary. What I’m hoping for is she’ll be able to tell us something like: “do 1 really dramatic grouping and 2 more moderate groupings for each table”, Or “2 dramatic and 3 modest per table”…  Or “just do 5 moderate / modest groupings per table”… Some guidance like that, then we can pick from the ‘menu’ of arrangements we’ve been given and see what fits in our budget.

Reflection: While I was driving today I took the time to try to put things into perspective. Take us for example; our budget has more than doubled. That means much of what we are asking from our vendors has also increased. So here we are close to our wedding date and more work has been created. Also, we are most definitely not the only couple doing this. I’m a programmer so I should know this so well — we call it ’scope creep’. A client gives you a project and a deadline, yet along the way they want more features but still want the same delivery date. So my flowers – the initial expectation was just 4-5 identical mixed flower arrangements down each table, which I was never very excited with. Finally, 3 weeks before the wedding I find my inspiration, though don’t really know what it will take to pull it off. Its also a type of set-up they don’t have experience with, so how can I expect them to know exactly what it will take? I need to be glad they are embracing my ideas and are willing to try.

Advice: Now today the anxiety is lessened. A piece of advice I have to other brides is don’t let yourself get too worked up. When you’re feeling lost and overwhelmed pick up the phone. They will hear your concerns and calm your fears. In fact, some of your concerns may suddenly seem silly. And remember, the pressure you are putting on yourself is WAY more pressure than anyone else will put on you. The issue that has become so big in your head may not really be that big of a deal after all.

Action Plan: The independent planner is hoping to set up the table and canopy today and give us a better idea of what we are working with. Tonight I will finally pick some flowers and just hope for the best. Really, does anyone else pay much attention to flowers anyway? They will see if the entertainment guy can stop by and give some insight on the lighting. Today we will finally formalize a menu. Most importantly we arranged a meeting for the day we arrive which will hopefully include both wedding planners, the DJ (and lighting person if it will be someone else) and the manager of the La Vista restaurant who will hold a tasting for us. Then together we will all walk the space and figure out what will go where and any last minute adjustments that need to be made. This will all still be three days before the wedding. Meeting this whole team of people I think will go a long ways to relieving any lingering concerns and have us ready to enjoy our guests when they get there the following day.

Note: after the wedding we’ll share names and reviews of all companies we are working with. I don’t want any of my rants to reflect poorly on someone that might end up doing an outstanding job.

When we went to Aruba in May, we happened to visit the Marriott on an evening when a wedding reception was going on. It was a small party of maybe 15-20 people. When we were there we saw them on the patio eating dinner. It was a beautiful night and everyone seemed to be having a nice time, however we found ourselves really distracted by the lighting. On the patio is one long table and above them shines down these spotlights! They seemed so harsh, so severe, and we knew that we absolutely do not want floodlights glaring down on us. At that moment we did not let it bother us too much. This was a small party and for all we know the couple had a modest budget to work with, so we thought maybe they chose the most affordable lighting option.

We decided early on that some more sophisticated lighting is ‘a must’. We’d like a mood, an ambiance created with the help of lighting. One of our favorite sources of inspiration is the photo shown here that shows lighting shining up through branches and casting the shadows of shapes on the top of the tent. And in our other inspiration photos you’ll see a common theme – soft indirect lighting – lighting that is ‘designed’. Another photo shows candlelight in lanterns which were the inspiration for the lanterns we purchased (and the inspiration for the ‘lounge’ area we want) and in another photo we’re intrigued by the lighting under the tables (we know we can’t have open candles on top).

Well yesterday we had a conference call with the Marriott’s wedding planner, Marriott’s lighting guy and the independent wedding planner. We were expecting some more sophisticated lighting options and were just trying to prepare ourselves for what it would cost.

So what are our options? Flood lights and tiki torches. That’s about it. They said the could do the ‘under the table’ with a yellowish light but there would be a cord running out to a plug which no one is sure is a good idea. At least they can help with the tiki torches. Tiki torches definitely help give the ‘island’ feel. I was envisioning tiki torches defining a path to the reception / dinner area, as well as helping to create a perimeter around our space. While we know we can’t have privacy with the location we’ve chosen, I feel like delineating the space with the torches will help it feel a little more like its ours. I explained this and didn’t really get a response. I can’t tell if they’re just not sure what I’m talking about or if they think its a bad idea. They did suggest adding some tiki torches to the cocktail hour though, which I think is a great idea – something I hadn’t thought of.

So now what? There is another vendor we can try to get a quote from, though he may not be available at this late date. He does do some pretty sophisticated event planning. He’s actually someone I had talked to months ago. He sent me a Power Point that had some really good photos in it. (Here is another vendor that doesn’t have a website at this time – at least not one I can find). Now the questions – is he available? What might it cost? Can we hire them direct or through the independent planner.

Marriott said they could arrange a call with the event planner. We asked though, could we make those arrangements through the independent planner? We were told, they would both be using the same company who is going to charge them the same. BUT – the big catch — the Marriott will add their 19% service charge (and 3% tax). Again – we’re still really really bothered by Marriott putting that charge on everything. I’ve mentioned before – Westin and Hyatt add a service charge to food and beverage only. However Marriott adds it to the entire bill – services they provide AND services they hire through third parties. So it was quite an awkward moment – Marriott is running the call, the independent planner is also in the room with them, and we are saying we’ve had enough of this service charge. Its not that we’re going to spend any less money, but money not spent on service charges is money that could be spent on more food and beverage. We’re not expecting to save money but get more for our money. We know its not the wedding planner’s fault – that its just a corporate policy that she can’t do anything about. I’m sure she gets tired of people nagging about that charge but it is significant.