I’m happy to say that married life so far has been wonderful! While its only been a little over three months, the wedding already seems like ‘forever ago’. So, I have to say I was quite suprised when I received an email from Reverend Robert Gibson just a week or so ago. Seems he found my review here on the blog and was disappointed. We exchanged a few emails that prompted me to take a look back.

Our ceremony was really nice, but my review of Reverend Gibson wasn’t as glowing as it was for some of my other vendors. Now I ask myself, how much of my disappointment was him, and how much was me? Well I hate to admit it was mostly me because he really did a fantastic job. His words were beautiful and he is a natural speaker. He was on time for the ceremony and for our meeting the day before, and we never felt rushed. He also let us pay him directly and took us at our word when we booked him. 

There were two main hang-ups I had. The first was during the ceremony when he asked us to say some words / vows of our own. When we met the day before he had told us about this – it was not a surprise. I was not very comfortable with the idea of being put on the spot but hoped he was right when he said “Don’t prepare, something beautiful always comes out”. Well I should have trusted my gut that said I know myself better than that! I am just not a good public speaker. I should have asked to remove that from the ceremony or should have prepared something, at least as a back-up.

During the ceremony itself, I’d wish I could say that I was just ‘caught up in the beauty of the moment’. Unfortunately, the earlier part of the day hadn’t been going as planned and we were pretty much scrambling. (Believe it or not we had some ‘groom-zilla’ going on! My bridesmaids were awesome and at my side with champagne while we were getting ready, however the testosterone side of the wedding party was missing in action!) When it was time for the vows, I think we were both simply thinking “We made it!”, instead of thinking those wildly romantic things we should be thinking. So, instead of “something beautiful coming out” I felt like a mumbling idiot. Not Reverend Gibson’s fault – just my nerves, not helped by a day that hadn’t been going as planned.

My other complaint was that I wasn’t told we needed to provide our own vase (and colored sand if we wanted it) for the sand ceremony. Normally your wedding planner would help you with this. Well, since we booked him directly neither of our planners thought to mention this. Maybe its a no-brainer – I guess people provide their own unity candles for a church wedding and really this is the beach version of a unity candle. Still, somehow it never occurred to me.

So, I think it was the morning of the wedding (or afternoon before) that I asked our independent wedding planner if she could help us out. She said she’d see what she could do and she did in fact find a beautiful vase for us. Left at that, the vase would not have remained an issue for me.

Well, unfortunately, just as we are packing to leave Aruba, three days later, we get an email from her wanting to settle up on the bill. According to my calculations, she owed us a little money (maybe $100) since we were leaving the mini lanterns and some large glass vases behind. We were glad to call it even and consider that money a tip because we were really happy. Well according to her calculations, we owed her money (again, only about $100). When I disagreed with her calculations, she started to hassle us, and all of a sudden ‘favors’ she had done for us were thrown in my face. So, having to buy a vase at the last minute didn’t bother me, but having that favor thrown in my face the day we were leaving left me with a bad feeling. I ended up in tears while we were packing and my husband and I ended up in an argument… and it was such a petty amount after $7,000 was spent with her. This again, was not Reverend Gibson’s fault, but one of the reasons my memories of the ceremony aren’t everything I had hoped they would be.

Finally, Reverend Gibson was concerned that I mentioned that my local contacts had recommended that we do not use him. He didn’t think it was fair for me to share the opinions of people that may have their own agendas – reasons for hiring other people that have nothing to do with what kind of a job he does. I was hoping people would get my point that despite what a couple of locals had told me, this was a case where I cared more about what the brides said! I went against the recommendations of all of my planners and hired him anyway. And the problems people suggested we might have? Well none of them happened! He was punctual, his performance was flawless and our guests loved him. Throughout the Aruba.com forum you will see people raving about Reverend Gibson. No one is even a close second when it comes to endorsements.

Bottom line, I’m an absurdly shy person that just doesn’t speak well in front of a group, even when that group is people I love. And had I done just a little more homework, I would have found out about the vase. In fact, I would have enjoyed shopping for it and would have brought it with me (and paid $30 instead of $80). If I were to do it again, would I use Reverend Gibson? Yes! Would I ’say words of my own again’? Well, I’d organize my thoughts and loosely prepare something, but would leave that decision to be based on how that day was going. And I did suggest Reverend Gibson mention the vase to couples that hire him direct, just as a courtesy.

On a side note, I’m sure the officiants the planners recommended would have been wonderful too, but there is very little information available about them. We weren’t going to be able to meet our officiant so I wanted to be able to read reviews and hopefully see a website. Reverend Gibson has both! ArubaEloquent.com is his website and I exchanged several emails with him in the months leading up to the wedding. If you have used Reverend Gibson or another officiant and would like to share your review, please do! Reply as a comment here or send an email to info@ourarubawedding.com. (Posting a comment requires an email address, however it will not be shared on the blog.)

Photo: credit StoryByPhoto.com