Our Aruba Wedding

First I want to THANK all of the wonderful people that I have gotten to ‘meet’ through this blog! While I started this to help other couples I’m amazed at how much THEY are helping ME! Its been such a help to share ideas with others going through the same thing and even have opportunities to vent to someone that ‘gets it’. The latest ordeal has been invitations! I’ve spent hours and hours (and hours!) looking for an invitation I love. I finally found a couple I ‘liked’ and requested samples. I want something that suits the occasion – classy but not stuffy, colorful and cheery, and tropical / beachy without being trite. I thought I had looked at just about every site out there. There were some ‘destination wedding’ invitations that I thought were cute at first, but then saw similar ideas over and over and quickly realized what a cliche they were. Ugh! I hope to never see another ‘message in a bottle’ or ‘watercolor beach / palm tree’ again!

While I admit the samples I ordered weren’t anything I was excited about, I have to tell you that this is the last thing I expected my fiancé to have an interest in! Well sure enough, he is interested and has his opinions! He wants something that is traditional and formal! Well I was intent on having something that reflected the informal atmosphere we will have at the wedding. So now, after I have already spent more hours than I dare to admit to looking for invitations, the search starts again, together. Luckily it took him less time to realize how frustrating it is. It was funny to see him drawn to two extremes – super formal to totally corny.

Anyway – yesterday afternoon I had pretty much given up and decided I was going to make them myself and merge a couple of ideas I liked. I get off the phone with my dad (he owns a printing company and I had just talked to him about printing an invite I design), and there is an email waiting for me from another Aruba bride. In there is a couple of her favorite invitation links and wouldn’t you know – there it is! The Decadent Designs “Destination Pocket” invitation. I’m so excited! Its the perfect compromise for my fiance and I – formal enough for him with the pocket setup and pretty script, but bright and ‘organic’ for me and even tastefully adds in a couple of small shells to tie in the beach! Thank you Thank you Cindy and Lynsey!

Lynsey of Decadent Desings LLC, does personal, hand made invitations often featuring luxury materials and fantastic embellishments like crystals, ribbons, etc. She started her small business when she went through the same thing – desperate to find the ‘right invitation’, finally giving up and making them herself! I think many of us can relate to this beautiful, young newlywed (married Feb 2008) who happens to love Aruba! Here are a couple of her other ‘destination’ designs: Classic Shell and the Boxed Starfish. While they may seem pricey at first, prices include everything you see in the photo and there is NO minimum order! We would have spent as much with someone else that enforces minimum orders and has lots of ‘add on charges’ like changing colors, adding enclosures or embellishments, etc.

I am happy, happy to announce that our favorite lanterns will soon be available in Aruba. By mid-August our independent wedding planner will have these in her possession! One of my ‘must-haves’ is candlelight for dinner, however the wind in Aruba makes that a challenge! We got excited about the prospect of lanterns but were not liking what we were finding on Aruba. While the ones we were able to find do have a ‘rustic charm’, we want our personality reflected in something that’s more contemporary. We think the lanterns pictured here are a chic way to carry through the ‘island’ theme while still suiting the personalities of us and the hotel. Thank you thank you to our wedding planner for making this happen! We really appreciate the investment she is making on our behalf.

If you want to know where you can find these, just send an email to info@ourarubawedding.com and I’ll pass along her contact info.

Well I know I’ve been quiet the last week or so. We’re kind of in a holding pattern with the planning of the wedding itself. The wedding planner at the Marriott likes to start planning about 3 months out, so in the next two weeks or so that process should be underway.

These last several days I find myself being kept up at night with so many ‘other things’ I should probably have done by now. This time last week I had no bridesmaid dresses, no invitations, no ‘first dance’ song, no welcome bags or contents, no veil, little weight loss (about 4 of the 10 pounds I want to lose are gone)…

Invitations have been a challenge. I want something that is somewhat informal and fun, but still contemporary and reflects the event itself. I spent countless hours researching ‘Destination Wedding’ and beach wedding invitations. The message in the bottle and other themed invites with starfish and sand dollars that I had thought were so cute at first, very quickly felt cliche. We’d go from one extreme to the other – given we have to send out less than 50 we figure we can splurge and do as elaborate an invitation as we want. Elaborate quickly becomes complicated though and then I go the other direction of wanting as simple as possible. Funny thing is that invitations is the last thing I expected my fiance to want anything to do with and would you believe he does care a lot about the invitation and wants something completely opposite of me?! Never saw that coming. Hopefully we’ll finally have one picked out later this week.

Of the list items, the invites and bridesmaids dresses are the most urgent. The weekend before last I went shopping with my bridesmaids and found out that these things take 12 weeks to order! Unless of course you want to put a rush on it. I was convinced we would just find something off the rack which would be nicer anyway, but that was proving to be difficult. Our colors are orange and pink. I wanted a nice bright (but not blinding), ‘happy’ tropical pink for the dresses and was amazed at how hard that is to find in a regular dress! And here I thought I was being easy – I told the girls a lightweight, knee length dress in my pink but they could pick the fabric AND style AND they don’t have to match.

My girls happen to love J Crew but I had seen their swatches months ago during a trip to NYC and didn’t like their pinks (one had a lavender tint, another was ‘dusty’, another super pale and the forth looked ’salmon-y’). Several weeks ago I had thought I might as well take another look at the swatches hoping they would look better in another light, and asked them to mail me their pinks. They said sure, 7-10 days but a month later still no swatches. I had pretty much given up on J Crew. I was ready to take on Plan B – a champagne color. I did like the idea of a shimmery sandy color that would coordinate well with the guys in their white shirts and khakis. And of course, champagne is easier to wear again.

Well this last weekend my fiance and I stopped into J Crew. At first they told us they do not keep sets of swatches in their store because they change so often. We explained the situation – 13 weeks left and the spring / summer colors were on sale and were going to begin selling out. They called their corporate office to have swatches rushed to me and just after that one of the girls remembered they had some ‘returns’ in the back so she could show us some of the colors. The only one we thought might work was the ‘tea rose’ (even though I think that’s the one I had thought looked salmony on the swatch). Well it turned they had that pink in two different fabrics and we did like it. They let us bring it out into the natural light and we found we loved their tea rose pink! (The champagne was really pretty too, but very light and I wanted a little more contrast.)

After seeing all of this, one of the other J Crew workers came up to see what was going on and we told her the story. Well, turns out they did in fact have swatches. She brought out the swatch book and for some reason that pink doesn’t look nearly as good on the swatch as it does on the dress. Left to the swatches, I would have had a really hard time picking that pink. So, I call my girls and said “Pick whatever you want in Tea Rose pink”. Well they both loved the knee length Sophia Silk Tricotine dress that was marked from $165 to $99 (pictured – the color looks different than it does on screen – this pic looks ‘coral’ to me)! If J Crew had sent the swatches I would probably still be looking for dresses. And, if we would have decided on that color weeks ago they would have paid a lot more for the dresses. So, at least this is one case where it paid to wait, though I wouldn’t recommend it!  =)

One function we are planning to have is a Welcome Party on the night we expect most of our guests to arrive. (Most guests will arrive around 2pm on Thursday – Wedding is Saturday.) What started as an informal, ‘Stop down to [designated space] at [time] and introduce yourself’ has turned into a real party. Our challenge is to try to do something nice enough to get the trip off to a good start, but keep our budget under control.

Our Welcome Party will have an Indian theme. I am American and my fiancé is Indian. While the wedding will be a western non-denominational wedding, we want to incorporate some Indian tradition so we will have a henna artist at the party. She will do bridal henna for me as well as henna designs for any other ladies that want to participate (even men and kids will be invited to get a henna ‘tattoo’.) We’re hoping to have some Indian music and food.

Our first approach was to try to get a good rate on their 1100+ sq ft “Governor’s Suite“. We figured we’d have to pay something for the suite, but could then cater in some Indian food from the Indian restaurant and play some Bhangra from the iPod. This suite has an awesome wrap-around balcony that would let the guests enjoy the outside and the view! Well, try as we must, the best they will offer is us 30% off the suite’s going rate even though they have 6 of them we only want to use it for a few hours. The best price we were offered was a little over $800, and our wedding travel agent’s best rate was just over $700. We were pretty disappointed at first, until I reviewed the floor plan of that suite. Turns out there pretty little ‘living space’. This suite has two full size bathrooms (weird), a bedroom and the living area, but has no kitchenette or even wet bar. So though we love the balcony, we’re glad we didn’t commit to that suite.

My next thought was going offsite to Moomba Beach Bar which is close by. I contacted them and received their catering menu. The food options look ‘ok’ but the pricing is really good. Unfortunately they do not have live entertainment on Thursday nights which would be a bonus, and they are ‘outdoor only’. So, Moomba, probably not, though I expect we may turn up there on another night for happy hour. =)

Plan C – back to the Marriott. We do plan to provide some snacks and non-alcoholic beverage. While we don’t plan to pay for alcohol, I would like it if there is a bar nearby so those that want to ‘indulge’ can do so easily. Our two best options may be the La Vista Restaurant or their ‘Atrium Terrace‘ (pictured). Unfortunately the manager of La Vista has been out of the office for a couple of weeks now and will be gone until early August, so I still have no idea what can be one at La Vista or how much it will cost.

The Atrium Terrace does sound promising though. This is an outdoor ‘patio’ off the lobby. It doesn’t have a beach view, but by 8pm the sun has long set. It does have a pool view though which I seem to remember is pretty at night. There is some seating and guests would be able to walk to the lobby bar for cocktails. We can cater some appetizers and they can set up a table for our henna artist. I was hoping that for the non-alcoholic beverages, they could set cans of soda on ice and have pitchers of iced tea and lemonade sitting out. Well they can’t do that — we have to have an actual bar set up. I’m not sure yet what those costs are. At least I think we can play music off the iPod.

OMG – this is an awesome day on Gilt! Stila bronzing powders and 24 kt lip gloss over half off. Fun, funky tropical beach wear and dresses from TIBI. Below are pictures of just a few of the items on sale. I really need to stop looking at this site! Gilt offers private 2 day designer sales at slashed prices (Stila and Tibi sales mentioned here end Wednesday July 22nd at midnight and items sell out fast). Sign-up is quick and free and if you choose they’ll send you a daily reminder of boutiques opening that day. (That’s what keeps getting me in trouble but I can’t help it!) I don’t receive other spam or junk mail from them – this is a first class site. Sign-up for Gilt.com»

Suddenly in the last week I’ve been having trouble sleeping. It seems that as I crawl into bed I suddenly start thinking about all of the wedding stuff I haven’t done yet! The day before yesterday I realized there is less than 4 months to go and I hadn’t even started looking at invitations, didn’t know what our budget is going to be and therefore don’t know how much I can spend on a Welcome Party, don’t have bridesmaid dresses picked out, didn’t have a proposal from an independent wedding planner, was giving up hope that I’ll be able to find the kind of decor I want…

This last weekend we were ready to take at least one matter into our own hands – We were shopping and we found some lanterns we love on sale at Restoration Hardware and almost bought them on the spot. We figured we’d have them shipped to Aruba. Well, RH doesn’t ship to Aruba. Turns out shipping items like that isn’t easy thanks to customs. I’m told we would need to ship to an ‘exporter’ in a ‘port city’. Then they handle the product and customs and get your shipment to the island. So, lots of extra time and cost. Our other idea was to have the large floor lanterns made in India and shipped from there, but again, expensive and shipping hassle and what would we do with them afterward (except try to sell them to the wedding planner)?

Well today there may be a flicker of light at the end of the tunnel. I’ve maybe found a wedding invitation – not one I’m totally in love with but one that will probably be close enough. My maid of honor is coming into town this weekend to look at wedding dresses. And most important, it looks like the independent wedding planner we adore may pull through for us! She has put in a lot of work trying to find solutions for us. Today she gave me options of TWO different kinds of canopies which she is going to invest in for us. She has also received her folding chairs and priced their rental, AND a big bonus, she may have found the lanterns we want! So, it looks like by the end of the week we may have a budget put together!

So now I get to take a breather for a couple of days while I wait for the wedding invite sample to arrive and enjoy some time with my maid-of-honor, bridesmaid and flower girl. My fiance is going to work on the budget and I’ll try to be a good sport when reality sets in and he needs to reign me in. =) But for not at least, a small ‘lanterned light’ at the end of the tunnel…

I think we have a wedding day itinerary! I’m not one that sees myself getting married ‘at sunset’, but the sunset will definitely play a part. So before we could even start putting a schedule together we had to find out when sunset is. Here’s a great website that will tell you the sunset time of any day: www.timeanddate.com. We will have sunset at around 6:15, so now we start working backwards.

I would like for my guests to be able to enjoy the sunset during the cocktail hour while we get our private sunset photos. So, that puts cocktail hour at 5:30-6:30. The ceremony is expected to be about 20 minutes so I was thinking wedding at 5:00, but the hotel wedding planner insists that no one will be at the cocktail hour that quickly. (People want to say their congratulations, get some photos, etc.) Also, the photographers would prefer the ceremony be a little earlier so the sun is a little higher as they take ceremony photos. Makes sense to not have the sun right in their eyes and back-lighting us. So, that brings us to a 4:30 ceremony. Only downside is that its really hot at that time but we’re keeping things casual (no suits and ties!) and will have guests met with ice cold coconuts upon the finish of the ceremony. Another bride said they actually cut the cake their on the beach after the ceremony and we kind of like that idea.

So here is the day:

• 11:00am: Hair and make-up
• 2:00: “Getting Ready” (dressed) photos
• 2:30: Photos of my fiance and I alone
• 3:30: Photos of us with wedding party
• 4:30: Ceremony on beach (steel drum music)
  
• 5:00: Cake Cutting, Congratulations and photos with guests
• 5:30: Family photos
• 5:30: Guests move on to cocktail hour also on beach (steel drum music continues)
• 6:00: We sneak away for our sunset photos
• 6:30: Dinner
• 7:30: PARTY! (DJ for dinner and dancing)

While there is part of me that doesn’t want him to see me til I walk down the aisle, after talking to the photographer I think its a good idea to get the bulk of our photos together done before the ceremony. She says we will still plan out that ‘first sight’ and she will capture that moment we see each other for the first time. She also says having those photos out of the way helps us to relax and have fun and takes off some of the pressure walking down the aisle. And best of all we’re ready to party earlier!

This weekend my fiance and I were hanging out in the bookstore and of course I was sitting with a pile of wedding books and magazines in front of me! I stumbled across a couple of books by Karen Bussen that I loved! Lots of tips for a simple, sophisticated decor. In a place like Aruba you don’t want elaborate decoration competing with the gorgeous surroundings. Karen has elegant, timeless ideas. The books are a quick easy read with lots of photos for inspiration.

The ones I looked through were “Simply Stunning Wedding Flowers” and “Simple Stunning Weddings”.

I want to take a moment to say “Thank You!” to the brides that have emailed me letting me know they have found this journal helpful! I really appreciate the feedback. I’m eager to hear from couples that are going through or have gone through this process and planned a wedding in Aruba. I’d love to hear what you have learned. I’m sure everyone reading this would love to know which location you chose and why, the things you wouldn’t change and things you wish you’d done differently. Are you also going through the ups and downs that I am or am I just over-complicating things?

Well unfortunately there hasn’t been much progress in the last couple of weeks. I’m still waiting on proposals for decorating (using outside vendors) and still have a lot of unanswered questions. The latest issue is trying to sort out the Welcome Party. The Marriott says they don’t really start planning the wedding details until about three months out which I understand, but we have to get our budget inline. The big wildcards out there are the wedding decor that the Marriott does not provide and how much it will cost us to throw a nice welcome function. (The woman that would be able to answer questions about one of our Welcome Party options is out of the office until August!)

Decor that the Marriott is not able to supply includes the canopy we’d like over our dinner area and the ‘lounge area’ we’d like to have in the reception. If these things are prohibitively expensive with an outside vendor, then we might as well allocate the funds to the Welcome Party. However if they can be done, we may have to trim other areas of our budget. We are now less than 4 months away and I don’t think its unreasonable to expect these questions to be answered by now. Still, I’m trying to be patient.

Of course the easy answer would be to just let Marriott handle all the outside vendors. Will it be worth it to hire my own services? I have absolutely no idea. Of course this is a small island I have to wonder if the same vendors will provide the services whether they are hired by me or the Marriott. Maybe they would rather just work with the hotel? If that’s the case, I wish someone would just say so.